In The Beginning...

The year was 1903, and the world was enthralled with the St. Louis World Fair. To be specific, William Warnock had brought a gargantuan 403 pound pumpkin to the fair, to the amazement of all who saw it.

That was a world record that would stand for 75 years.

For 75 years, the world lay waiting...... for Howard Dill. Using seeds from descendents of Warnock's amazing fruit, Howard Dill created a new breed of pumpkins, the Atlantic Giant. From 1979 until 1984, Dill broke the world record annually, and was recognized in the Guinness Book of World Records in 1981 for growing a 493.5 pound monster.

From those humble beginnings, the sport of Competitive Pumpkin Growing erupted!

Since 1992, the world record has gone from 827 to 1469 pounds. Bessie, a mere child grown in a hostile environment in an unfavorable climate from a nondescript seed, beat that Guinness record set in 1981.

Did I mention that the first 1000 pound pumpkin, grown in 1996, earned $50,000 for its owner?

There are few things which motivate men more than breaking barriers which other men thought were impossible. The first four minute mile. Putting a man on the moon. Babe Ruth's 60 home runs. The quest for the One Ton Pumpkin is next - don't be left behind!

A fan writes: “wow this is the kind of blog that makes an international hit because everyone just starts reading it…”

Thanks Nick! Now I just need some good Legal Representation to help me trademark the "Pumpkin Grower Survivor" series before those greedy retards at Fox beat me to it!

(Bessie overcame her rot with twice-daily bleach baths. We'll think about moving, weighing, and carving her the 1st of October.)

"That pumpkin is the talk of the neighborhood."


... is that good or bad, I wonder?

Countdown to Halloween: Trauma Time

The vines are gone, the pumpkin is picked. Even I'll admit a growing pumpkin is a lot more interesting than a ripe pumpkin just laying around taking up space.

But that's rot in the stem. And see the hole to the left? Is Bessie about to be compost?






There were two borers in the stem. All weekend I've slowly cut off rot until I'm about out of stem. The white stuff is caulk, where I kept trying to plug the hole. And the caulk just keeps oozing right back out. Georgia humidity doesn't help.









56 days until halloween? Gulp.

Don't tell the Pharmacist's Association I'm misusing the "Oral Use Only" syringes. I'm injecting a combination of fungicide and insectice into the hole.